Hi, coach Vincent. It's actually quite refreshing to have a coach with us on In Touch. We usually have players on here, and to go from player to coach is quite an interesting switch. Considering all the players and clubs you've worked with, we bet you have a bit to share with us.
Ha, ha, ha. Yes, there are a lot of stories, especially from the time I spent at Dondol Stars.
Great. Let's go for it.
Last season when I was at Dondol, I was also coaching another team in my township, Emalandela, which was participating in the SAB League, which is now the Hollywoodbets League. So, whenever someone had a birthday, we would buy that person a cake and smear some cream on his face and then pour that person with water. Then we had to share the cake. That was our way of celebrating someone's birthday. So, there was someone who had a birthday on this particular day. We got the cake and then we poured some water into two litre bottles and we hid them. After training, we started cutting the cake and we smeared some cream on his face. But he noticed that there was something else that was planned when one of the players went to fetch a bottle of water. When he realised that it was that time for him to be poured with water, he decided to start running.
Ha, ha, ha, you can run, but you cannot hide…
We were at a community park, and it was after 18h00. It was getting dark, so I decided to chase the guy and I ran with the cake in my hands. The grass was not level and there was a hole in the ground, which I saw. So, I saw the hole and jumped to try to get over it, but I realised that I jumped a bit too early and then I fell into that hole with the cake in my hands. The cake was all over my body and it was as if I was the one who was having a birthday, ha, ha, ha.
That's hilarious. It must have been as you were literally sending a message to birthday boy that 'you can't have your cake and eat it'.
I was white because of that cream. It was on my shirt, my pants and on my head. Now the boys were all laughing at me after that. It was so funny. So, the boys were like, "Coach, we might as well pour you with the water." It was so embarrassing, ha, ha, ha. The boys probably laughed at me for maybe three weeks. Whenever I rocked up, two or three of them would start laughing and I knew exactly what they were laughing at.
Surely, you will never forget that day. Next time, with cake in hand, make sure to kyk daar (look there) in the ground and time your leap.
I will never forget it, ha, ha, ha.
Let's continue…
When I was at Dondol, we had our centre-back, Francis Baloyi. He is now at Polokwane City. So, he missed training on Monday and Tuesday that week. He was problematic at times. When he came back to training, coach Victor Tshabalala said, "Don't go onto the pitch for training! Go back to where you came from." At the time, I was Victor's assistant. Then Francis said, "But coach, I was sick." Coach Victor disputed that he was sick. He was like, "You were busy drinking there at your home." Francis said he had not been drinking.They were arguing and then Francis had to prove that he was sick. He started crying and he took off his training kit and his undergarment. He was like, "Coach, look at my stomach and my hands. Can't you see how much I have lost weight", ha, ha, ha. He was a senior player in the team. So, when he did that, everybody started laughing because of what he was doing to try to prove that he was sick. The funny thing is that a few days before that, he had said to our bus driver, "A man does not cry", but then he was the one crying that day.
That must have been fun for you guys watching this exchange between coach Victor and Francis… or is it Fransick?
It was such a funny moment because he was really trying to prove that he was sick. I've just thought about another story…
Don't keep us waiting… share, share, share.
There was a caretaker at the clubhouse at one of the clubs I worked for. The caretaker was complaining that the players were having too much tea and coffee on a daily basis, and he wanted them to reduce their intake because they were finishing the teabags and other things quickly. So, he came up with a plan. He took a container, and in that container he put in sugar, put in coffee and fresh milk all at one go. He was trying to save things, so they all had to pour from that container, ha, ha, ha. The players were complaining. They were like, "If you put five spoons of sugar, that means you put in five spoons of coffee." It was frustrating for the players, ha, ha, ha.
Talk about a man with a plan, ha, ha, ha. Must have been a "bittersweet moment" for the players, with coffee and sugar in the same container. Turns out we didn't make a mistake going for a coach this week. We definitely have to bring you back next week!
Ha, ha, ha. I've definitely got a few more stories to share with you.
Awesome, cheers.
Heita daar!
By Tshepang Mailwane
IN TOUCH FUN FACTS
Nickname: Stiga
Car: Polo TSi
Boots: Puma Future
Favourite teammate:
Thami Masiya and Edwin Gyimah
Favourite roommate: Edwin Gyimah
Favourite food: Pap, chakalaka and braai meat
Favourite footballer:
Themba Zwane and Marcelo Allende
Best friends in football: Thami Masiya, Abednigo Mosiatlhaga and Edwin Gyimah
