Ricardo Goss is in a position he is not quite used to at SuperSport United and he admits that he is wondering what his parent club Mamelodi Sundowns is thinking regarding his future.
Goss is in his third season at SuperSport, on loan from Sundowns, and he is now in an unfamiliar situation of having to watch matches from the bench. For almost two and a half-seasons, he has been the number one at SuperSport, but now there's someone else who currently has not let go of the number one jersey.
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That man is Thakasani Mbanjwa, the goalkeeper who joined SuperSport before the start of the season after leaving Moroka Swallows, who sold their top flight status to Marumo Gallants.
Towards the end of last year, when Goss was out with an injury, Mbanjwa got an opportunity to play and he's done what anyone would do in that situation - take the chance. His performances have been so good that it's become difficult for head coach Gavin Hunt to leave him out of the starting line-up.
At the moment, Goss is adjusting to the whole situation and there's some worry, he admits, about what the future holds beyond this season, considering that there are just a few months left before his loan deal expires.
"I am on strange ground, I won't lie. It's not easy. I try to take it one day at a time, but it's tough. I try to work and I'll see where it lands me. I do extra work and I occasionally train with the DDC just to get my mind off. The more I spend time being active, the more I forget about the fact that I am not playing. It's that and a lot of family time, just to get your mind off football a bit. So far, it's working," Goss said to the Siya crew.
"It's stressful, I won't lie, because you also think about back at Sundowns. You think where's their mind at because I am not playing. You think, 'am I going to come back or do they release me when I come back?' There's a lot on it and I try not to think about it, but at the end of the day I am going to think about it because I am human. There is a lot riding on this and giving up is not an option."
There's also the Africa Cup of Nations (AFCON) to think about for Goss. Having been part of the Bafana Bafana team that finished third at AFCON in Ivory Coast last year, it goes without saying that Goss would love to form part of the side going to Morocco this year. That, of course, is easier said than done. He'd have to win his place back in the team.
"Obviously it's a big one. It's AFCON. We did well at the last AFCON and we want to try to change the colour of the medal this time. I am trying to fight my way back into the team, which is not easy at the moment. It's a tough ask for me, but I am going to work my socks off to be back."
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Through it all, Goss is not bitter towards the man who is currently the number one at SuperSport. In fact, he is trying his best to support Mbanjwa and there's good reason for this, as he explained to the Siya crew.
"Obviously Thaks (Mbanjwa) has been doing well and he has been there for me. I won't lie, he is the first one who always tells me what I could have done better and I'd ask him 'what do you think?' One thing I like about him is that he will give me his honest opinion. He is not going to try buy face or anything. It makes it much more easier for me to support him and be with him."
